Living WORD

Points for Reflection: I am sharing to my dear readers a story which has been a part of my collections to help you reflect as the Universal Church celebrates the SOLEMNITY OF ALL THE SAINTS .

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Some years ago William Golding wrote a popular novel called Lord of the Flies. It’s about a group of 14-year-old schoolboys.

The boys become marooned on a deserted island when a plane evacuating them from England, during World War II, crash-lands in the Pacific Ocean. The pilot and the copilot are killed outright, but the boys all survive unharmed.

At first everything goes well for the boys. They enjoy the adventure of exploring the island and of being on their own.

But then everything goes sour. Bickering breaks out among them, and they split into two rival groups. Gradually they turn savage and start killing one another.

One of the points that emerge from Golding’s story is that, left to itself, human nature turns violent.

In other words, without laws and structures to guide it, human nature tends toward evil. It takes the path of least resistance, and chaos results.

Put positively, Golding’s point is this: Society needs laws and structures if it is to survive. Without laws and structures, society soon degenerates into a kind of jungle.

Nothing is sacred; no one is respected. (Illustrated Sunday’s Homilies)

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Religious Humor

RECALL NOTICE!
IMPORTANT!
The maker of all human beings is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to the serious defect in the primary and central component or heart. This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype units, resulting in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units. This defect has been technically termed, ‘Subsequential Internal Non-Morality,’ or more commonly known as S-I-N, as it is primarily symptomized by loss of moral judgment.

Some other symptoms are:
(a) Loss of direction
(b) Foul vocal emissions
(c) Amnesia of origin
(d) Lack of peace and joy
(e) Selfish, or violent, behavior
(f) Depression or confusion in the mental component

The manufacturer, who is neither liable or at fault for this defect, is providing factory authorized repair and service, free of charge to correct this SIN defect, at numerous locations throughout the world. The number to call for the recall station in your area is:
P-R-A-Y-E-R

WARNING: Continuing to operate the human unit without correction, voids the manufacturer’s warranty, exposing owner to dangers and problems too numerous to list and will result in the human unit being permanently impounded. For free emergency service, call on J-E-S-U-S for prompt assistance at any location worldwide.

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BILLBOARD MESSAGES IN FLORIDA

You think it’s hot here? – God

Big bang theory, you’ve got to be kidding. – God

Keep using my name in vain, I’ll make rush hour longer. – God

What part of “thou Shalt Not…”didn’t you understand? – God

Have you read my #1 best seller? (There will be a test) – God

Do you have any idea where you’re going? – God

Let’s meet at My house Sunday before the game. – God

That “love thy neighbor” thing, I meant it. – God

My way is the highway. – God
Don’t make me come down there. – God
I don’t question your existence. – God

(author:unknown)

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Religious Light Bulb Jokes…

How many Charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

One to change the bulb and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.

How many Calvinists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. God has predestined when the light will be on. Calvinists do not change light bulbs. They simply read the instructions and pray the light bulb will be one that has been chosen to be changed.

How many Baptists does it take to change a light bulb?

Change???

How many neo-orthodox does it take to change a bulb?

No one knows. They can’t tell the difference between light and darkness.

How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.

How many independent fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, because any more might result in too much cooperation.

How many liberals does it take to change a light bulb?

At least ten, as they need to hold a debate on whether or not the light bulb exists. Even if they can agree upon the existence of the light bulb, they still might not change it, to keep from alienating those who might use other forms of light.

How many Catholics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They always use candles.

How many worship leaders who use guitars does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But soon all those around can warm up to its glowing.

How many members of an established Bible teaching church that is over 20 years old does it take to change a light bulb?

One to actually change the bulb, and nine to say how much they liked the old one.

How many United Methodists does it take to change a light bulb?

This statement was issued: “We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that a light bulb works for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your personal relationship with your light bulb (or light source, or non-dark resource), and present it next month at our annual light bulb Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-life, and tinted-all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.”

How many Amish does it take to change a light bulb?

“What’s a light bulb?”

How many youth pastors does it take to change a light bulb?

Youth pastors aren’t around long enough for a light bulb to burn out.

How many Southern Baptists does it take to change a light bulb?

109. Seven on the Light Bulb Task Force Subcommittee, who report to the 12 on the Light Bulb Task Force, appointed by the 15 on the Trustee Board. Their recommendation is reviewed by the Finance Executive Committee of 5, who place it on the agenda of the 18 member Finance Committee. If they approve, they bring a motion to the 27 member Church Council, who appoint another 12 member review committee. If they recommend that the Church Council proceed, a resolution is brought to the Convention floor. They appoint another 8 member review committee. If their report to the next Convention supports the changing of a light bulb, and the Convention votes in favor, the responsibility to carry out the light bulb change is passed on to the Trustee Board, who in turn appoint a 7 member committee to find the best price in new light bulbs. Their recommendation of which hardware has the best buy must then be reviewed by the 23 member Ethics Committee to make certain that this hardware store has no connection to the Walt Disney Corporation. They report back to the Trustee Board who, then commissions the Trustee in charge of the Janitor to ask him to make the change. By then the janitor discovers that one more light bulb has burned out.